The Glory Days
by ChampagneWishes
Summary: *Reposted* What happened between when Ryan passed out on the floor at the hospital and when he wakes up in his bed a week before school starts at the beginning of Season 3? Why, lots of angst of course. SS
1. Chapter 1

A/N: Sooo you may have noticed I reposted. I rewatched the first episode of season 3 and realized that it starts with Ryan waking up and it's a week before school. So, here's what happened between when Ryan hit the floor and when Ryan woke up from his dream to Seth standing in the pool house telling him that it wasn't a dream.

My Original A/N: So after I started writing "The Other" and it was reviewed (you all are fabulous and I wouldn't write if it wasn't for all of you *hugs*) I started thinking about something beachtree said about how we never saw what that summer was like for our fabulous foursome and the Cohen clan -1. So I decided to write my own version of the summer, completely ignoring of course any events that happened in The Others.

What to expect? I'm thinking, lots of dark/withdrawn Ryan, a distant Sandy, Seth will be lost in the shuffle of things, and Marissa will just be there and we all know that usually means drama with a side of trouble. Add water. A little Ryan!whump because we all know I can't resist. And stir.

Hope you all enjoy.

It was the pain that woke him up, a distant aching pain. Familiar. Yet detached. Someone else's face, not his own.

He opened his eyes and stare blearily at the clock on his bedside table.

It was almost noon. He should get up. Drag his body out of bed. Or he could just go back to sleep. And hope that when he woke up it was time to go to school. The bottle of pain killers the doctor's had give him was by his bedside. He took another pill.

*******************************************

Seth gazed longingly out at the pool house. He wanted to go and talk to Ryan, but he wasn't sure what to say. Or if Ryan even wanted him around. Maybe he just wanted to be alone for awhile? Seth sighed, and stirred his bowl of cereal. It was soggy.

When had everything fallen apart? It had been so sudden. Like a sand castle that seemed sturdy and then was suddenly washed away in a storm. His mother. She'd been washed away in her own quiet storm, all along it had been raging inside of her, and she had told no one. Hidden it from them all. How could that have happened?

There were supposed to be close. The perfect family. He looked over at the fridge. Last year's Christmas photo was still tacked to the fridge. Perfect smiles. Matching sweaters. It was mocking him. He barely even knew it was happening. One moment he was staring at the picture. That perfect goddamn picture that was a complete lie. Then his cereal bowl was in his hand. Then there was a cereal bowl hurtling towards the fridge. Then there was spilled milk. A broken bowl. Bits of cereal sticking to the shiny glossy lie that wasn't so shiny or glossy anymore.

Then Seth got up, walked to the fridge and took the photo down, and ripped it into two. And threw it away. Then he set about cleaning the mess. Glad it was there. Glad he had made it. Now he had something to do. Something to think about. Something to keep his hands and mind occupied.

********************************************

"Hey Seth," Sandy came in, a forced smile. His voice an octave higher and a decimal louder with its forced cheerfulness, "How's it going?"

"Fine." Seth's eyes didn't lift from the video game.

"Good, good, great- Where's Ryan? I left work a little early, thought maybe we could all go to the movies or bowling or something."

"Pool house."

"Oh right, right- what's he doing out there?"

"How should I know?"

"Well, let's go get him. Get this party going."

"No thanks,"

"What?" Sandy's smile faulted, "What do you mean no thanks?"

"I mean, no thanks. Not really in the mood for a movie."

"Since when is Seth Cohen _not_ in the mood for a movie."

"I don't know Dad. Since when was Mom in the mood for a cocktail at 8am?"

"Seth…" Sandy's voice had that tone. The one that he used right before he went for a threat.

"Sandy…" Seth echoed him. He turned off the television. "I'm going upstairs-"

"Hey, don't walk out on me!" Sandy yelled, but Seth was already halfway up the stairs.

"Well- what's gotten into him?" Sandy asked aloud. No one answered. He forced another smile onto his face and went to find Ryan. Maybe he'd have better luck with him. Maybe Ryan could talk Seth into the movies. Or at least Ryan could provide a Seth-to-human-translation.

The pool house was dark, Sandy knocked and there was no response. "Ryan?" He knocked again. Was Ryan even here? He opened the door. When his eyes adjusted to the dim light he noticed a large lump on the bed. "Ryan? Hey kid, are you okay?" He approached the bed, and touched Ryan gently on the shoulder.

Ryan's eyes flew open and he stared up at Sandy's looming face, "Sandy?"

"Hey kiddo, are you feeling okay?" He moved his hand to feel Ryan's forehead but Ryan moved away from him.

"I'm fine, jus' tired. What time is it?"

"5 O'clock, I was thinking maybe we could have a Cohen men night out. Grab pizza? Go to the movies."

"Yeah, no thanks…" Ryan said, turning away.

"What is going on? Seth just said the exact same thing to me." Ryan shrugged.

"Sorry,"

"Yeah, don't worry about it kid." He clapped him on the shoulder. "What do you want for dinner? I could order in pizza?"

"No thanks… Not really hungry…" Ryan said.

"Come on kid, you gotta eat."

"I ate a late lunch." Ryan lied.

"Right, right…" Sandy sighed, and went back to the house. Ryan felt bad as he watched Sandy's slumped shoulders walk away, but sleep was calling his name again.


	2. Chapter 2

*Inside the pool house*

He woke up. Took another white pill. Went back to sleep. Didn't look at the clock. Had lost track of the days. Didn't care.

****************************************

*Outside the pool house*

"Seth, seriously, it's been like three days. I'm like... deep fried. Mayor Bloomberg is going to ban me from coming within his cities limits. Can we please do something else?" Summer never thought she would see the day that she'd be begging to go do something besides lie out by the pool.

"Like?" Seth didn't move an inch from his inflatable raft that floated in the middle of the pool.

"I dunno... Anything else but this?"

"I'd suggest video games or comic books... But you hate both of those."

"Yuck. Yes, you're right. How about we, I dunno, go to the mall or something. I'll go with you to the comic book shop. You can make out with me in front of the guy who works there who didn't believe I existed." Summer pleaded.

"Mmm... Tempting, but no thanks."

"Come on Cohen, this is seriously rediculous. And where's Chino?"

"Chino?"

"Yeah you know? Ryan- your foster brother? Blond hair, blue eyes, likes to hit stuff- that Ryan."

"I dunno... Think he's sleeping or something."

"Sleeping? For three days?"

"He had a rough few before that. Jail is very tiring from what I hear."

"Marissa says she's hasn't spoken to him since..." She didn't finish the sentence. She wasn't sure how to finish it. ...Since she Trey, though true, sounded just too... Terrible.

"So? She can do what you did and just show up here or something."

"Yeah but..." She looked again towards the pool house. All the shades were drawn. "Aren't you worried about him?"

"No, why should I be? I'm not his parent."

"His brother just got shot!"

"And my mom's in rehab but you don't see me sitting around boo-hoo'ing my fate. I don't sit inside all day and sulk. I come out here. I soak up rays and sun. I enjoy the sun's warmth and glory. I'm working on my tan. I'm reconnecting with my desert-dwelling roots. Forty years in a desert Summer, forty years!"

"Right, I'm sure they had infinity pools with inflatable rafts in the desert too. Seriously Cohen, I can't take any more of this."

"Fine... fine... Let's go watch a movie."

"I meant, we should leave the confines of your home."

"What for?"

"I dunno... Fun? Something to do?"

"We have food. Shelter. A pool. Movies. What could the outside world possibly offer us?"

"Is this about Ryan?"

"What?"

"Are you like afraid to leave him or something?"

"No! He's a big boy, he can take care of himself."

"Okay good, so let's go. Let's go to the video store. Or, go to the pier. Take out your skateboard. Something! Please Seth- I'm begging you!"

Seth sat up on his pool float looked around for a moment, like he was seriously considering it, and then sank back onto it, "Yeah, no thanks. Feel free to go, I'll be right here." He closed his eyes and crossed his arms.

"That's it- I'm going for reinforcements." Summer stood up from the chair and strode purposefully toward the pool house.

"Wait Summer- you can't go in there! Don't you know about bears in hibernation? Don't poke the sleeping bear?"

"Fine, then get out of the pool and come with me."

"Fine, go ahead, lose a hand or an eye. See if I care."

"Fine! I will! And when I do- it's going to be all your fault!" Summer knocked loudly on the door. "Chino! Yo Chino! Ryan!"

It took a few moments but finally a pale, dishelved looking Ryan came and opened the door, and peered out into the blinding sunlight, "Wha-? Summer?" He looked down at her confused. Her hair was mussed and his face was still badly bruised and swollen.

"Dude- you're alive!" Seth called out cheerfully from the pool.

"Uhmm... Yeah..." Ryan looked around.

"Chino, make Seth get off that raft. He's been on it for three days." Summer whined.

"You woke me up- to make Seth get off that pool float?" Ryan looked at Summer in disbelief.

"No, I woke you up because sleeping for three days, just isn't healthy. Now call Marissa. Oh, but first, please get Seth off that raft."

"I haven't been asleep for three days..." Ryan muttered.

"Actually dude, you have. Trust me. I've been right pretty much the entire time." Seth spun the raft in a circle.

"You're purple," Ryan said.

"I think you mean 'bronzed.'"

"No... I meant purple... I'm going back to bed." He turned around but Summer grabbed his arm.

"God! What is wrong with the two of you? Chino- you are not going back to bed. Cohen- get out of that pool. We are going to go do something. And it's going to be fun! And if we don't-" She turned and stared daggers at them both.

"I think I just turned to stone..." Seth said, flipping off his raft and into the water.

"I'm not afraid of you Summer," Ryan sighed, and gently pulled his arm out of her grasp.

"Can't punch a girl Ryan and I will make your life a living hell until you agree to my demands... So why don't we just do this easy way?" Summer said, her voice reasonable but slightly inpatient.

"Dude, trust me, the easy way is better. Kid Chino only has his fists of fury. He's powerless against the 'rage blackout.'"

Ryan sighed, "Fine, whatever."

"Awesome, thank you for your cooperation. Now can you like take a shower and put on a change of clothes? You smell like an old sock."

"Thanks Summer..."

"Anytime," Ryan disappeared back inside the pool house. "Oh and I'll be checking on you in ten minutes so you'd better not be asleep or naked!" Summer hollered. She glanced towards the pool. Seth was now lounging on the steps. "Cohen? Take a shower! Get dressed! And move!"

"God... Such a slave driver..." Seth muttered as he climbed out of the pool. "You know you would have felt right at home with the Pharaoh's..."

"Seth- just go!" Summer ordered. She sighed as she picked up her phone and dialed, "Hey Coop,"

"Hey Sum, what's up?" Marissa's voice held little enthusiasm.

"Not much, I was about to go to the diner with the boys. Do you want in?"

"Do you really think Ryan wants to see me?"

"He might..." Summer pleaded.

"I shot his brother."

"Yeah, but, he knows its not your fault... I mean, Trey was going to kill him right."

"Sum, I appreciate the invite, but I think I need to give Ryan a little space, okay?"

"Yeah, okay... I'll stop by later?"

"Yeah, sure, I'll be here..." Marissa said.

"Alright, bye Coop, hang in there..."

"Yeah, you too... And can you tell Ryan... Actually never mind."

"You sure? I don't mind being the messenger."

"No, it's fine."

"Okay..."

"Bye Sum...."

"Bye Coop." Summer hung up and stared at the phone.


	3. Chapter 3

_*3 Days Earlier*_

_"Someone please help him!" Sandy yelled as he knelt on the floor beside Ryan. "Ryan... Come on buddy..."_

_"Ryan!" Marissa screamed. Tears pouring down her face. Seth could only stare and stumble. Confused. Police. EMT's. Why was no one helping Ryan? He stumbled to get out of the way as someone hospital- looking wearing scrubs, pushed him aside. Police came running foward to. Someone rushed by with a stretcher. They spoke in clipped efficient tones. _

_"Sluggish response on the pupils- possible concussion. We need to get a CT scan. Guarding on the left- side, looks like we might have some cracked ribs, we're going to need to get some x-rays. Severe swelling and bruising of the face. We're going to need pictures of that."_

_A stretcher materialized. It was lowered, and when it was lifted Ryan was on it. Sandy stood back, helpless as he watched an unconcious Ryan get wheeled away. He saw Seth. Put his arm around him. Both stood. Numb. Shocked. _

_"What's going on...?" Seth whispered, "What happened to him?"_

_"I don't know, the doctor's are looking over him now. It's going to be okay... it's going to be okay." He whispered._

_

* * *

_

A/N: Trying out something different...


	4. Chapter 4

Ryan picked up a french fry and then used it to poke at his untouched burger. Summer took a sip of her hot chocolate. Seth sat with his milkshake's straw in his mouth, but seemed to have forgotten it was even there.

Ryan sighed, and then dropped the fry and pushed the plate away. Seth and Summer glanced at him but neither of them said anything. He looked back and forth between the two of them, "You know, I think I'm just going to walk home."

"What?" Seth dropped the straw.

"I just... I need some air."

"We can go man, if you need to..."

Ryan shook his head, "You two stay, I kind of want to be alone..." He stood up.

"You sure?" Seth asked, he looked at Summer. She stayed quiet but was looking up at Ryan with a concerned expression on her face.

"Yeah, positive." Ryan stood and dropped a twenty on the table. Way more than his meal, but he had already made it to the door. Seth made a mental note to give him some money when they got home. He would give Ryan the whole twenty back, but he knew he'd never take it.

"Is he... okay?" Summer asked.

"I... I don't know." Seth admitted. "I mean, his brother's in a coma..."

"His brother also smashed his face in... If Trey wasn't in coma... He probably would have killed Ryan."

Seth shrugged, "I think he's just... Kind of confused right now. We need to give him time."

"You sound like Sandy Cohen."

"I think it may actually be a direct quote. The time part... Not the confused. I'm sure he had a word that sounded much more SAT- like."

* * *

Ryan walked home, and wished it wasn't so quiet. Quiet left him room to think. He wanted to be alone. But he didn't want silence. He wanted... White noise. White blank noise so he didn't have to think about anything. Like when he was asleep. He tried to put his mind somewhere else. His cracked ribs hurt with every step. So did his face. The pain. That was good. He could focus on that. Each bright jolt of pain was one less second of silence in his mind. One more step closer to his bed where he wouldn't think about anything. Another jolt. White. Sharp. A tiny blade in his side. A jagged splinter. That slowly faded to a dull throb, until he took the next step. Another flash that subsided into a throb. Home drew closer with every throb.


	5. Chapter 5

_The room was grey. Dim. The light wasn't right. Not for the pool house. Or the living room. His eyes opened. There was a hand holding his. The hand loooked familiar._

_"Sandy?" Ryan croaked, his eyes opening a little wider. He looked around him. "Where..." His voice was hoarse. It hurt to talk. His throat. Hands. Trey's hands._

_"Oh thank god..." Sandy said, "Nurse!" He yelled towards the door, "I need a nurse in here!" His hand never left Ryan's. "How are you feeling kid?"_

_"Like I..." Suddenly, there was only the rolling turmoil in his stomach. He tried to get up from the bed, but Sandy held him down, but couldn't do the same for his stomach. He felt hot bile force his way up his esaphogus. A try appeared in front of him. He gagged, as his stomach expelled its contents. Sandy's hand was on his back, rubbing in soft soothing cirlces._

_"It's okay kid... It's okay." He murmered softly. "Let it out..." With a last heave, Ryan fell exhausted back into the bed, and put a hand against his ribs which had alerted him to the presence of injuries with sharp pangs of pain that seemed to reverberate around his torso almost to his spine. His fingers felt the thick padding of an ace bandage. He looked at Sandy, "Cracked, but nothing's broken." Sandy answered Ryan's silent question. "And a concussion."_

_A nurse had been holding the tub underneath him, Ryan realized. She had moved it away now that Ryan seemed to be in danger of vomiting again. "Where's Trey?" His voice was still a broken whisper._

_Sandy hesistated, but as he looked into Ryan's determined eyes he knew he had to tell the truth. "He's in the ICU but he's stable."_

_"Is he awake?" _

_Sandy shook his head, "Sorry kid..." He handed Ryan a glass of water. Ryan took it and winced as he took a cool swallow. "How does your throat feel? They said you were lucky there, nothing worse than some bruising."_

_"Hurts... When can we go home?"_

_"Soon," Sandy patted his leg._


	6. Chapter 6

The house was quiet. Which should have been weird. Except Seth realized he had gotten used to it. Which was also weird. Before Ryan, the house had usually been pretty quiet. Then Ryan had come. There had been noise. And uproars. Now it was quiet again. Seth didn't like it, he decided, as he wandered aimlessly through the house and somehow found himself in the quiet empty kitchen. He looked out towards the pool house. It was dark. The blinds were drawn. Ryan was clearly not in the mood for conversation.

Summer had dropped him off at home after a nearly silent and kind of awkward meal at the diner. After Ryan had left Seth hadn't know what to say. And neither had Summer. Their normal Newport lives had come to a sharp halt with that bullet. Things that had seemed important, suddenly seemed stupid and trivial. How could you talk about SAT's when someone was lying in the hospital in a coma? How could you discuss beach plans when your friends were worried about being thrown in prison? How could you pretend things were normal when they just weren't?

What or rather, who, Seth really wanted was his mother. But she was in rehab. Right. That was just. Awesome.

His mom was supposed to be there. She was supposed to hug him. Tell him everything was going to be okay. She was supposed to be there to fix this. She could have coaxed Ryan out of the pool house. She would have told Seth to stop moping and feeling sorry for himself. To go and be a brother. But she wasn't here. She had been too busy feeling sorry for herself and pouring out her sorrows to a bottle of vodka.

Even Sandy. The unflabble. The determined. Seemed at a loss for how to cope with the boys.

Nothing to do. He went to the fridge. Opened it. Stood there in front of it. It was more empty than usual. He wasn't hungry but eating was at least something to do. Hummus. Leftover chinese. His mind barely registered the contents. He realized that if he hadn't been alone. Someone would have come along by now and told him to close the fridge. Milk. Ketchup. But there was no one to tell him anything. Gatorade. Wine. There should have been someone- there should have- wait, wine? Seth's eyes slid back to the half- opened bottle of wine. He wondered where it had come from. Had his father indulged in it? Was it his mother's? He stared at it. The enemy. The one that had landed them all here. It seemed so innocent. So innocuous. He pulled it out of the fridge. Stared at the lable for a moment. He wondered if it was cheap or fancy. What it smelled like. What it tasted like. What his mother. And Ryan's mother had found so irresistable. If anyone would miss it.

He opened it. Poured a glass. The refridgerator door was still open. He closed it. Sniffed his glass. It smelled okay. He took a sip. It was sharp. The flavor bit his tongue, and slid icily down his throat but when it reached his stomach it felt oddly warm. He smiled a little at the glass and then took a gulp of the wine. Pleased when his fingers began to tingle slightly. He finished the glass off. And poured another. He looked at the bottle. Well, mind as well hide the evidence. If the bottle was just gone no one could question why it was 3/4 empty. Not that there was anyone paying enough to question why it might be empty. He finished the second glass. And then, with a grin, finished the bottle- drinking straight from it. Like his mother always told him not to do from orange juice cartons and milk jugs. But this. This was even worse. More devious. He liked it. He tossed the bottle into recycling. With a flash of panic he decided to tie up the bag and carry it out to recycling. His dad would like that.

He realized after only a few steps towards the garage that he was drunk. He managed to get the recycling bag into the trash and then wobbled his way back into the house. He could go to bed. Sleep it off. But as he walked towards the steps and he looked up at them, he decided they seemed a little too daunting.

Food. Food could soak up the alcohol. He decided cereal was best. Easy to make. Carb loaded. Plus he couldn't remember the last time that they had ordered chinese food.

He poured himself a bowl and sat down at the counter. Methodically putting one bite into his mouth after another. He looked out towards the pool house. Gazed at it longingly. Wished Ryan would come out of there. Come out of his little cave. Wished everything could just go back to normal.

He looked at the fridge. Noticed the family photo taking at Chistmakkah.

_Perfect smiles. Matching sweaters. It was mocking him. He barely even knew it was happening. One moment he was staring at the picture. That perfect goddamn picture that was a complete lie. Then his cereal bowl was in his hand. Then there was a cereal bowl hurtling towards the fridge. Then there was spilled milk. A broken bowl. Bits of cereal sticking to the shiny glossy lie that wasn't so shiny or glossy anymore._

_**************************_

Sandy looked up from his stack of paperwork and sighed. He shouldn't be here. He should be home with his boys. He glanced at the clock. It was almost 3:30. And it was the summertime.

He reached a spur of the moment decision. Pushed back his chair and stood up. He was going home early. He was going to go home and spend some time with his family. He was going to make everything better. They would go to the movies. And to dinner. Seth would be delighted. Ryan would go along with it. He was certain.

"Hey Pete, I'm headed out. Going home to see my family." He yelled to the guy in the office next to his.

"Sure, see you later." Pete yelled back.

He drove home. Parked in the drive way. Took a deep breath. Sighed. The forced a smile on his face. His family seemed so _stuck- _unable to move foward. Well, he was going to make them move foward. No more sulking. No more hiding. It was time for them- all of them to face life and take it head on.


	7. Chapter 7

_"Ryan... The police still need a statement." Sandy said, his voice soft. He rested a hand on Ryan's shoulder. Ryan looked up at him and nodded as two police officers entered the room. Ryan tensed under Sandy's reassuring hand as the two grim looking men face him. _

_Their questions were terse and to the point. It hurt Ryan to talk as he struggled through the questions. As if the "victim" wasn't his brother. As if he hadn't been the one afraid for his life as his brother had held the telephone above his head. _

_"He was going to kill me..." He whispered. The words seemed to echo in his mind. My own brother was going to kill me. Marissa saved me. Don't they see that? The police officers exchanged a look. They glanced at Sandy. They wrote something down. His head ached. His face hurt. It hurt to breathe. To talk. He looked up at Sandy helplessly, his eyes begged Sandy to help him. _

_"Look, Ryan's been through a lot today, and he's given you a statement. Is there anything else-?" Sandy asked, raising his thick eyebrows at them._

_"No, I think we're all through here." They snapped their notepads shut. "We'll be in touch."_

_"Of course." Sandy nodded. Led them to the door. They didn't look at Ryan._

_"What's wrong?" Ryan asked when he saw Sandy's face._

_"Nothing kid, everything is going to be fine." Sandy told him._

_"You're lying." Ryan said, but he didn't care. He was tired. He wanted to go to sleep. He wanted Sandy to keep lying to him._

_"They think I told you to say that..." Sandy said, he sat down next to Ryan. _

_"Told me?"_

_Sandy sighed, "About Trey- about thinking he was going to kill you. Makes the self- defense case stronger."_

_"Sandy... He's my brother... And he would have killed me." Ryan closed his eyes, but the one hot tear fell anyway. Streaked his bruised cheek. Sandy would have brushed it away but he was afraid of causing Ryan any more pain._


	8. Chapter 8

*Ten Days Later*

"A party?" Seth looked at Summer, as if stunned by the suggestion. She had in fact woken him up when she burst into his room that morning, err, afternoon rather- he realized as he glanced at the clock. It was almost 2pm. He'd been up late and he'd learned that kicking Zombie- butt was a lot harder but more fun when drunk. "You've never invited me to a party before..." He was sceptical.

Summer scoffed, "Well, then, it's about time." As if that was the most obvious thing in the world.

"Right..." Seth still wasn't convinced.

"It might be fun."

"Bunch of water polo players beating me up... Yeah, how could it not be fun?" His mouth was dry. He had a headache.

"Well, it's at Holly's beach house. And I'm going- with or without you."

"Is that a threat?" Summer rolled her eyes.

"No, it's a fact. Seth, come on, I know life like totally sucks right now, but I can't take anymore of this! I'm bored! It's summer vacation and so far we've done nothing but wallow. Well, I'm sick of wallowing. There's a party, and I want to go. And I'd like you to come with me. And Ryan should come to. If you don't want to go, fine, I understand, but seriously, Cohen..." She looked at him with pleading eyes. "Please?" She begged.

Seth sighed. Decided he might be about to get bed sores. And a party seemed like as good a place- if not a better place to get drunk than his own living room. Besides, his dad might start missing all the wine he'd been sneaking out of the cabinet. "Fine, let's go."

"Really?" Summer squealed with delight.

"Ughh... Could you not make that sound- like ever again?"

Summer rolled her eyes, "Whatever Cohen. I'm off to get a manicure. I'll see you tonight." She kissed him on the forehead, then wrinkled her nose, "And take a shower before I get here- you stink."

*********************************************

"Get up. We're going to a party." Seth walked into Ryan's room and yanked the covers off him.

"Wha-" Ryan sat up, and looked around confused and bewildered. "Huh?" He stared at Seth uncomprehending.

"You heard me. Party. Up."

"We hate parties." Ryan reminded him.

"Normally yes, I would completely agree, but... Summer said she was going with or without me so..."

"So? You two go."

"She made me swear I would take you." Seth lied.

"Is Marissa coming?"

"I dunno... Don't think so." Seth shrugged. "Dude, whatever. We'll go. We'll get drunk. You can beat up a few water polo players. It'll be good for us."

"I'll think about it." Ryan said, and rolled over.


	9. Chapter 9

_"You're going to need to take it easy for the next few days, okay?" The nurse said, her voice high and bright. Too high. Too bright. She was watching Ryan warily. He was the kid who had come in with a gun shot victim. The one who's face was a patchwork of bruises. The kid who had been questioned by the police. "Your body needs time to heal." That was fine with Ryan. He had no where to go. Nothing to do. All he wanted was his bed. And some kind of strong painkiller. Sandy was holding several small sheets of white paper where with a quick jot of the pen the doctor had scrolled out a perscription for sleep. Blissful, empty sleep. _

_Like the moment he had his the floor, and suddenly there was nothing. The pain had been gone. The ache of all that had transpired had disappeared. Like a weight lifted from his shoulders. He wanted to go back there. _

_But first, there was something he had to do. He turned to Sandy and whispered, his voice hoarse and exhausted, "I need to see Trey."_

_Sandy looked at him, furrowed his thick eyebrows, "Are you sure kid? Trey's out- he might not even know..."_

_"I need to see him." Ryan insisted. _

_"Okay," Sandy gave him. _

_The hospital insisted he use a wheel chair. They brought him to the elevator than up to the ICU. _

_Trey was in one of those beds. Partially hidden behind a curtain. Ryan climbed out of the wheel chair. He heard someone behind him protest but he didn't care. He walked foward. His steps were slow, painful, stiff. The pain of life. Of living. Of being the one left behind while his brother slept onward in his blissful sleep. _

_Monitors beeped. Steady. A heartbeat. Trey's heart. Beep. There was a chance Trey would wake up. And then..._

_Beep._

_...What then?_

_Beep. _

_Ryan took a deep breath, tears stung his eyes._

_Beep._

_He wiped away the tears quickly, winced as his hands touched the tender bruises._

_Beep._

_"Can we go?" He asked. _

_Beep._

_Sandy nodded, "Of course. Let's go home." They walked away. The beeps faded in the distance, but Ryan could still hear them. Beep. _

_He heard them the whole ride home._

_Beep._

_He heard them as he stumbled through the kitchen. _

_Beep._

_Out to the pool house._

_Beep._

_In his bed he could still hear the sound. _

_Beep._

_A white pill. A glass of water._

_Beep._

_The sound lulled him to sleep as the pill pulled him under into a silent oblivion. _


	10. Chapter 10

_*6 Days Later*_

"Where's the picture?" Sandy asked, looking at the fridge.

Ryan and Seth looked up from the cereal. Sandy had insisted they both get up that morning and do _something_. So far cereal was as far as they had gotten.

"What picture?" Ryan asked as he poked at his cereal with his spoon. So far he hadn't actually taken a bite of it. Sandy realized he wasn't sure when he had last seen Ryan eat. The bruises on his face stood out visibly against his pale skin.

"Yeah Dad, what picture?" Seth shoveled a several bites without looking at the fridge.

"The picture- with the family? And the sweaters?" He looked back and forth between his sons, but neither of them said anything. He noticed Ryan's arm was draped protectively around his ribs. "How are you feeling kid?" He nudged Ryan's arm gently.

"Fine..." He muttered.

"Okay, so, what are we going to do today?" He asked, smiling broadly as he looked back and forth between Seth and Ryan. They both looked up at him with blank faces. "We could... go to the movies? Comic book store? The pier?"

"With you? Are you trying to kill our social lives?" Seth asked.

"Yes, your social lives... Which I've seen so much of recently..." Sandy shook his eyes, "Come on guys, I know this is hard with your mom gone and Trey... But sitting around the house all day sulking..."

"We don't sulk," Seth said, and pouted.

"I'm going back to bed." Ryan pushed his cereal bowl away and stood up, and started to walk out to the pool house.

"Ryan- wait!" Sandy called out after him.

"Ribs hurt... Headache... Going back to bed." Ryan waved good bye and walked outside and slid the door shut behind him.

"And I suppose..." He looked towards Seth.

"Yeah," Seth grabbed his bowl and put into the sink and then walked out of the kitchen.

Sandy looked around the empty kitchen and sighed. And looked again at the empty spot on the fridge. Was that- cereal? He shook his head, and cleaned up what remained of the breakfast.

*****************

Sandy knocked softly on the pool house door. "Ryan- you in there?"

He heard a groan, "Yeah."

"Mind if I come in?" He asked, and let himself in the pool house. He found Ryan sitting up in bed, his hair was touseled and he had taken off his shirt. Sandy winced as he noticed the bandages wrapped around Ryan's ribs. Ryan raised an eyebrow at him as if to ask what Sandy was doing. "How are you feeling?"

"Okay, I guess."

"You have a doctor's appointment on Monday," Sandy reminded him.

"Yeah, I know." Ryan said, his voice was dead.

"Ryan, you know I'm here..."

"How's Kirsten?" Ryan interrupted.

"She's fine- she's doing fine."

"Good." Ryan said. Sandy could tell Ryan was trying to get rid of him. He wasn't going to talk. Not today.

"Well, let me know if you need anything, okay?"

"Yeah, okay." Ryan slid down in his bed, rolled over. Closed his eyes.

"See you later kid..." Sandy said, and he turned and walked out of the pool house.


	11. Chapter 11

_"My son- where's my son?" Sandy burst through the ER doors. There was confusion and chaos. Apparently they didn't get gun shot victims every day in Newport. _

_"Dad!" Seth called. Seth looked pale and frightened._

_"Don't answer any questions!" Sandy heard Ryan's voice._

_"Ryan!" Sandy called out to him. He watched Ryan turn towards him. Look at him. "Ryan are you okay?" Ryan 's feet seemed to sway beneath him. He was looking at Sandy... Wasn't seeing._

_His face a mess of bruises. _

_He watched as Ryan swayed for another moment, and then fell. _

_Oh God. Sandy felt his heart stop._

_Oh God. Kirsten was going to kill him. He was supposed to keep the boys safe._

_"Ryan!" Marissa was screaming. Sandy pushed his way past the doctors and the police and the nurses. _

_He reached Ryan's crumpled body. Grabbed his hand. Checked for a pulse because he didn't know what else to do._

_"Ryan! Ryan can you hear me?!"_

_"Dad! Dad!" Seth's voice high and panicked. "What happened?"_

_...If only I knew._


	12. Chapter 12

"What is that?" Summer stared at the offending item of clothing in horror.

"I think they call it a wife beater. You know, it's amazing that they call it that. I mean, it feels like it should be called something more pc. You know like 'alternative spouse control.'"

Ryan raised an eyebrow and Summer rolled her eyes. "Let's just go." She said, striding to the front door with a flourish and a huff.

"Well, if the lady commandeth… After you-" Seth made a sweeping gesture with his arms towards the door.

Ryan studied the door for a long moment. "I dunno…" He said, he put his hands on his waist and glanced down at the white tank he was wearing, what Seth was now referring to as the, what was it again? Spouse control? The corners of Ryan's mouth twitched in a delayed reaction to Seth's joke.

"What? What's so funny now?" Seth stared to panic for a moment.

Ryan shook his head, "No, nothing." A deep breath. A slight twinge from his still- healing ribs. Alright. Time to do this. He took a step forward. "Wait, Seth, can you just… Tell me again why we're doing this?"

"We're doing this so Summer doesn't leave my side and leave me to have a one- man pity party. Because you know what, those aren't pretty. Although I must say you are being a fine host of your own."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Ryan asked.

"Anywho, so now, Summer wants us to go to this party. And we're going to go. We're gonna have a drink. Ah drink." He repeated. "And then we're going to go. No dunking of Seth, no drunking of Summer, no punching by Ryan."

"No what?"

The horn blasted outside. "Can we go already!" Summer yelled from the car.

"You know, for a little girl, she makes a lot of noise." Ryan said.

Seth nodded, "You're telling me. But no, seriously, she'll like, come in here and take our heads with her if our bodies won't go."

"So we should probably go?"

"Yeah, we should probably go." They lingered for a moment longer, and then walked to the door. Ryan closed it softly behind him. And realize it was the first time he had been out of the house in almost two weeks.

Alright, maybe Summer was right. Maybe a party would be good for him.

A/N: I know, it's short, but heck, it's something right? It's been a long time since I've done any OC'ing (or fanfic'ing in general) so I'm sorta easing myself back into it. Hope you liked it!


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